I recently attended an orientation at an agency that needs registered nurses to work overseas. Actually, my ninong asked me to go and see if it’s for me. Next thing I know I already signed up with them allowing the company to be my only agency that will process my papers, etc. Sheesh. Like I have other plans. Might as well sign up with them to put a direction to where I am going. After all, I have no idea which way to go. LOL.
After the legal stuff, it immediately dawned on me that I have to take the NCLEX exam in two months. Now that’s real pressure. And all the direction that I was hoping to find all disappeared. Where will I start? When will I make it happen? And where will I go for all the good stuff? See, it kills me to have all of this confusion. Hmm… Party, anyone? LOL!
With all these not making any sense and coming all to a blur, I have decided once and for all to take any risk I need to take, take a deep plunge onto the bottomless sea of uncertainty, and perhaps just cross the bridge when I get there. I’ll let myself get mad when I need to, let myself cry when I get unfortunately lost and have myself a good round of redhorse when the situation calls for it – or maybe even if it doesn’t. LOL! Meet new friends, meet old friends. See new places, make educational mistakes, and learn from experience. I’m just happy to discover life and its endless beauty.
So the Huckleberry Finn adventure starts here.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
My Three Week Notice
May 17, 2009
It has been quite a few weeks since I started my blog site and still the site is pretty much like nothing. LOL. Well, I have been struggling to have internet access that’s why. I’m so pathetic. But here I am to make it up. Here’s the story of my life for the past three weeks:
First off is my nursing career. Actually this is not something I want to talk about but since I find it quite depressing, I might as well share it than keep it all bottled up. It has been a drag for me to go to work every morning as a nurse at my alma mater’s hospital. It’s very frustrating for me because since I’m new, I can’t quite keep up with the fast-paced life in the ward. I mean, I have been trained and all but I still get stuck. In computer terms, nagha-hang ako. I forget things that I importantly have to do. I get confused with all the doctors’ names and their medical specialties. I get lost with protocols, processes, and procedures. I even messed up using the paging system! It has been a very tiring and stressful week because of all of the pressure. I can’t even say I love my job because if I do, then it wouldn’t be a drag at all to get out of bed before the break of dawn. Days passed, weeks swung by. I might as well say that I improved – at the very least – because of routine. Although of course, I have to acknowledge the patience and understanding of my new colleagues. I’m just striving really hard because I don’t want to be a pain in the neck for them. For a very physically tiring, intellectually stressful, emotionally draining and low paying job, I really don’t think it’s worth it. I just have no choice. It’s my only ticket to greener pastures.
On the other hand, another aspect of my life is on the brink of its reason. But I’m certainly hoping it’s not. I’m definitely, definitely working real hard to make it work. My relationship with my significant other is going through a rough road that I’m starting to lose faith on its strength. It would be undeniably hypocritical of me to say that everything is fine and that I am not hurt at all. Let’s just say, I believe I’m being put to test—WE are being put to test. The past certainly has its effect on the present. And it has been irritating to admit that the past is being nauseatingly clingy lately. Although there are some aspects of the past that we cannot avoid, let alone aspects that have already made a mark that will stay now and forever, I’m very proud to say that I have been very brave to put up a happy façade behind a bleeding heart. It has been very tough to accept but there’s not much that I can do but understand and be happy that it made someone’s life meaningful and content. It’s already there—alive and existent. And maybe if given the chance, I’ll be able to love and nurture that piece of the past as well in the very near future.
Last but not the least; the HEAT has been torturing me. And for all of those who agree, please say AMEN. The sweat and temperature has been adding up to the list of what has been giving me a lot of reasons to spend all my money on Zagu to ease out my stress. I. AM. LITERALLY. MELTING. I curse global warming and all those greenhouse gases. I curse the geographical location of my breath-taking country. And I curse my bank account for not having enough dough to buy an air-conditioning unit and support its electric consumption.
With all these said, I will understand if none of you will believe that I still love my life. LOL.
And this has been my sarcastically ungrateful self signing off for, hopefully, not another three weeks. *smirk*
It has been quite a few weeks since I started my blog site and still the site is pretty much like nothing. LOL. Well, I have been struggling to have internet access that’s why. I’m so pathetic. But here I am to make it up. Here’s the story of my life for the past three weeks:
First off is my nursing career. Actually this is not something I want to talk about but since I find it quite depressing, I might as well share it than keep it all bottled up. It has been a drag for me to go to work every morning as a nurse at my alma mater’s hospital. It’s very frustrating for me because since I’m new, I can’t quite keep up with the fast-paced life in the ward. I mean, I have been trained and all but I still get stuck. In computer terms, nagha-hang ako. I forget things that I importantly have to do. I get confused with all the doctors’ names and their medical specialties. I get lost with protocols, processes, and procedures. I even messed up using the paging system! It has been a very tiring and stressful week because of all of the pressure. I can’t even say I love my job because if I do, then it wouldn’t be a drag at all to get out of bed before the break of dawn. Days passed, weeks swung by. I might as well say that I improved – at the very least – because of routine. Although of course, I have to acknowledge the patience and understanding of my new colleagues. I’m just striving really hard because I don’t want to be a pain in the neck for them. For a very physically tiring, intellectually stressful, emotionally draining and low paying job, I really don’t think it’s worth it. I just have no choice. It’s my only ticket to greener pastures.
On the other hand, another aspect of my life is on the brink of its reason. But I’m certainly hoping it’s not. I’m definitely, definitely working real hard to make it work. My relationship with my significant other is going through a rough road that I’m starting to lose faith on its strength. It would be undeniably hypocritical of me to say that everything is fine and that I am not hurt at all. Let’s just say, I believe I’m being put to test—WE are being put to test. The past certainly has its effect on the present. And it has been irritating to admit that the past is being nauseatingly clingy lately. Although there are some aspects of the past that we cannot avoid, let alone aspects that have already made a mark that will stay now and forever, I’m very proud to say that I have been very brave to put up a happy façade behind a bleeding heart. It has been very tough to accept but there’s not much that I can do but understand and be happy that it made someone’s life meaningful and content. It’s already there—alive and existent. And maybe if given the chance, I’ll be able to love and nurture that piece of the past as well in the very near future.
Last but not the least; the HEAT has been torturing me. And for all of those who agree, please say AMEN. The sweat and temperature has been adding up to the list of what has been giving me a lot of reasons to spend all my money on Zagu to ease out my stress. I. AM. LITERALLY. MELTING. I curse global warming and all those greenhouse gases. I curse the geographical location of my breath-taking country. And I curse my bank account for not having enough dough to buy an air-conditioning unit and support its electric consumption.
With all these said, I will understand if none of you will believe that I still love my life. LOL.
And this has been my sarcastically ungrateful self signing off for, hopefully, not another three weeks. *smirk*
Monday, April 27, 2009
The Newbie is confused: Me or You?
And so I blog again. I have always wanted to maintain a blogsite just to have an outlet for my love for writing. But since then I am experiencing scarcity in terms of internet access. Haha! So now that I have my own laptop (and plans of applying for my very own internet connection at my apartment), I have no other reason not to push through with my first love.
I am 23 years old and this is my first real blog. The first ones were just kind of feelings of excitement to try out and write a blog. But now things are different. I want to make kwento about my most-of-the-time narcissistic self and the everyday happenings in my very, very exciting life. Yey. Oh, did I also mention that my more-often-than-not-especially-when-i-feel-like-it self is very charmingly sarcastic? LOL!
Anyway, I'm really hoping for this to be a regular thing for me. Some sort of a therapy for my always tired and stressed out mind. :)
Except, I have a dilemma. Since I'm new to this thing, I don't know in what point of view should I do this. Should I talk to YOU? Or should I talk to ME?
I am 23 years old and this is my first real blog. The first ones were just kind of feelings of excitement to try out and write a blog. But now things are different. I want to make kwento about my most-of-the-time narcissistic self and the everyday happenings in my very, very exciting life. Yey. Oh, did I also mention that my more-often-than-not-especially-when-i-feel-like-it self is very charmingly sarcastic? LOL!
Anyway, I'm really hoping for this to be a regular thing for me. Some sort of a therapy for my always tired and stressed out mind. :)
Except, I have a dilemma. Since I'm new to this thing, I don't know in what point of view should I do this. Should I talk to YOU? Or should I talk to ME?
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